Combat Stress Center.com

Getting the Most from R&R

 

LTC John Allen

 

785^th Med Co (CSC)

 

 

During their tour in Iraq most service members will be eligible for a two-week period of Rest and Recuperation (R&R).  To make this experience as enjoyable as possible, we offer some ideas and activities for the time before, during, and after R&R.

 

 

Before R&R

 

R&R should be looked at as a well-earned vacation.  As with any vacation, preparation and well-in-advance planning improve the chances that it will work out well.  It is especially worthwhile to discuss R&R plans with loved ones to be visited so that everyone involved understands each other’s needs and expectations.  This talk will also likely lead to a discussion about issues that could, otherwise, cause friction or hurt feelings during and after the visit.  It is also a good idea to “rough out” a schedule of activities and to prioritize them in advance.

 

Although the majority of service members opt to spend their R&R at home, many choose to go to a resort area either in North America or overseas.  There will also be some who choose to not take the R&R at all due to cost, loss of leave time, or emotional reasons.  The choice of what to do is entirely personal.

 

 

During the R&R

 

The best advice that can be given for looking at R&R is to expect change and not be upset by it.  Those left at home by the mobilization have probably found some new ways of dealing with family issues and may have assumed responsibilities that in the past fell to the service member.  They may do things differently, but the service member should recognize that often these new strategies are equally effective.  If further changes need to be made, it may be best to hold off on discussing them until the family is together for a longer period of time than the R&R.

 

Although many people may be competing for a share of service members’ time, everyone should keep in mind what he or she and the family most want from the R&R.  It is perfectly okay for the service member to decline invitations to time-consuming or burdensome social engagements.  Scheduling an “open house” can be an efficient and satisfying way to see many friends and members of the extended family.

 

The R&R period should also involve ample opportunity for rest and recuperation.  It is important to not over-schedule the time and to take time to just relax and have fun.

 

Members of the family have gone through a lot during the period of deployment and the service member should encourage them to talk about how things have gone.  R&R can provide opportunities to improve communications and intimacy with the spouse.  It is often a unique time for talking together “from the heart.”

 

Some final bits of advice to consider during the R&R include staying within a realistic budget and not drinking excessive amounts of  alcohol since one’s tolerance for alcohol is likely to be much lower after spending several months in the alcohol-free combat zone.  Finally, it is probably best to avoid interviews with the media while personnel are home.

 

For service members who experience problems during their R&R, the Army provides a help line (see sidebar).

 

 

After R&R

 

It is completely natural to feel strong emotions such as sadness, anger, disappointment and nostalgia upon returning to Iraq.  It is unlikely that the military unit will be exactly the same as when the service member left since changes in personnel, missions, and unit climate tend to occur rapidly in a combat theater.  Combat stress control teams and mental health providers can instruct in techniques to reduce tension and the negative feelings that may come after the R&R.  What works for one individual may not work for another.  For some, talking with a close friend or “battle buddy” about what one is feeling in returning to the unit can make a big difference.  For others, a renewed commitment to the job and physical activity will help them to readapt to life here.

 

Returning to the theater of operations will be tough for most service members.  For others whose R&R did go quite as well, returning to their lives here and leaving their home problems behind for a while longer may actually be a relief.  Regardless of the group in which service members find themselves, R&R should offer a new perspective on their experiences here and their lives in general.